i am not in love with my husband but he is a very good man and we both adore our kids but I want so much more
being in a relationship with someone you don't love will not make you a good person because you are constantly going to be wishing you were somewhere else, and if by chance you meet some else that gets your attention the situation will get worse with yourself and husband if you have an affair. this will not make you a better mom either,
you should talk to your husband and try to end things amicably for the sake of the children. they will not understand at first but they will once they are older and learn about life themselves.
one thing i do recommend you doing is if you decide to separate do not under any circumstance talk bad to your kids about their father, this will scar them for life. trust me my parents had a bad divorce and they talked really bad about each other to me. its not a good feeling.
it depends on your problems... if your only problem is you're not in love with him anymore, then I would say maybe get counseling and try to work on your marriage for the kids' sake if not for your own. But remember, you once loved him, so why not try to see what it was that made you fall in love with him in the first place.
But, if there are other issues that are making home life not good for the children... you guys are always fighting, substance abuse, etc., then no it would be better for the kids to have a calm stable home than live in a home with their parents constantly fighting...
Hope that helps and hope you can work things out... however is best for you. Good luck.
If you don't love your husband and you want much more...then you need to divorce him and move on, because it seems he can't give you what you are looking for. If you stay in this loveless marriage , you will become filled with resentment and you children will pick up on this unhappiness, which is not a healthy thing for them. Divorced people also make very good parents. Imposing a restraining order on oldest brother::
Dear redding6-ga; In rresponse to your reference to the "children" please note that I was merely making a comparision for comparision sake.
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You don't have to be spouses to be good parents. Also, your children deserve happy parents, not two people who settled and lived a lie for their "sake". Think of the guilt they will feel one day when they discover (and they will) the truth.
One question: You "want so much more;" but are you asking for a standard that is so high that he can't possibly meet it? I can't tell you how many times I've thought this question of my own marriage, it's a tough question, and is different for everyone. My wife actually admits she does this but won't change. I feel sad over it but I can't make her suddently change her ways or even make her love me as I love her. RE: Divorce, there can positives if you are like me, the glass is half full, i.e., it can be a way to show the kids (my daughter in this case) that divorce does not have to be through violence or fraught with difficulties. Peace to you as you and your family go through your journey. the elephant in the living room that no one talks ::
At some point, I have to choose to be father to my children, husband to my . I hope you stay tuned; I should be back in action by the end of this week
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The grass isn't always greener on the other side.
get marriage counseling
we ALL go thru those times when we dont feel like we use to, but love comes and goes in marriage
committment is hard, but you Can get thru it
Some people decide to do so, but its not always the right decision. If your not in love with your husband then what else is there? To stay will inevitably make you feel very depressed and in turn might be disastrous. You'll just be living a lie. You both can and hopefully will still be good parents, but everyone has the right to be happy. Don't leave your husband in the dark, sit down with him and discuss how you feel. Is there a particular reason why you don't love your husband anymore? If there is, then maybe this does not have to be the end of your marriage. There could be a chance that you both could try and work at it if not then decide where you go from here?
Did you ever love him? Did you fall out of love? Think about the things that made you marry him, and focus on that. Unless you married him for the wrong reasons, now that is not going to work.
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Should i stay married for the childrens sake? 
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